… Shall I tell you about how I start my day? Believe you me its same daily … These days I sleep somewhere in between 11 to 12 thinking I will get up early in morning…May be around 5:30 or so… In fact I put an alarm too …and today of all the people my cousin called up from Shahjahanpur (my hometown somewhere in India) … I don’t remember if he ever called me up when I was in Delhi…. Never ever… he called up around 5 in the morning … it was usual chit chat by the time it got over it was almost 5:30 should get up now …but nay … no matter how early you sleep or for how many hours you had slept …no matter if you are feeling fresh … you will always want to catch those 5-10 mins of sleep … and you will not realize when those 5-10 mins will become an hour and then even after that hour you will again stretch for another 15 mins ….and that too sitting with closed eyes as if you are meditating or doing some serious early morning thinking and then your prodigal roommate lazing around as you will tell you hey bro you go and take bath first …. You with half open (am just trying to be positive types otherwise i find half closed to be more appropriate) eyes will ask him: what? Did you say you going to take bath (as he leaves early …its today only he is lazing around) when you already know the answer is No… Okay finally you will give up and go to start of with your usual chores of brushing your teeth and being a male species you have an extra task of shaving to get that clean look otherwise people will either term the growth as fungus or will ask you, bro! Is everything right with you … or you going through a bad phase in your life…. To which you can do nothing but smile and say a gentle no…. or to simply avoid such nonsense questions you will choose to spend those five minutes and get that smooth look…. and by the way I can bet that for most of us regular shaving is much easier an option than donning a stub or a beard …. this I can say from my personal experience of number of unsuccessful attempts of growing some hair on my face … believe you me for us lazy types it requires much more care and attention to trim the thing than to just taking a razor and shaving the weeds off …. Okay now that you shaved and got that look…. its time to sit (or shit) on (in) the hot seat (henceforth pot) … (oh by the way this is the sequence I follow,  and it is not that you all should follow the same sequence … I love it this way …  but i presume we all end it up with a shower.. any exceptions here?) well before I talk about sitting on the pot, let me tell you one thing that for the best and most relaxing experience on the pot (now I again feel like calling it a hot seat but pot saves me typing time and my time is of utmost importance to me otherwise how can i write such sensible mails ..) coming back to the awesome experience on pot … for that wow experience I suggest you start your day with a glass or two of lukewarm water … (now this water thing gives me a strong urge to digress again and talk about water ..but i stop myself and not give in to this urge so easily and complete my pot story) and after those glasses of lukewarm liquid wait for some time (and that is the reason I brush and shave … now you got the point) and then relax on the pot … and now when you are sitting here you have all the time in the world to think to doze off to read and this the time you would like to use … it seems so waste sitting on the pot … when you think you are not using any of your body part (well you forget those petty messy intestines.. how can you) and how can waste that time this is the time when you either read newspaper or that extra office reading you wanted to do …or its a great time to read few pages of the novel you have been reading for the past few days … for some this is the only time when they get to catch up with their friends over phone … busy poor souls ..They want to squeeze every minute of their life … and then there are some who smoke ….well whatever you do … it does make you feel better…. (I am safely assuming you other than the things you were doing to utilize your time you also did “the (shit) thing”)

Other day my prodigal roommate corroborates this when he said… God has been so kind to us … there are so many ways to feel better: You shit you feel better … you take a hot water bath you feel better … you sleep you feel better!!

Well being from an Indian origin where we have enough water to waste or to wash … the biggest cultural change (or is it an environmental change … I don’t know … leave it up to you … I call it change) change i find here is in terms of water using patterns….. It was a shock to me when I found out that after shit affair I cant use water to wash…. man it was a real blow to my “feel better” experience … How on earth can you use paper …. (Well that rests the case if they are saving water …they are using paper which I think is equally bad for environment). It is so messy to use paper…. Yuk!! however I have no choice and am getting used to it now … and day by day my feel better experience is not getting back to normal ….Its different I have to spend extra minute in shower … and all these days I have felt guilty of wasting enough paper … (we need to do a research which is more harmful for environment…. any B school student want to take that up? I know they do anything and everything at B schools)

Second water saga is …drinking tap water … man i never did that in India … we use to drink filtered …and also RO (reverse osmosis ..Some trick that makes water much more pure) water…. and here I have to drink directly from the tap … now don’t tell me they have filtered or ROed water running from their taps … or I am not too sure, some of my friends told me they have different water supplies for kitchen and bathrooms … I hope this is just true otherwise I will take few more weeks to getting used to drinking water directly from tap….

Oh in all this i forgot to tell you that if you are living in a decent apartment you will get supply of hot water so very easily that it makes your life comfortable…. turn one way you get hot turn other way you get cold … (now its not that you don’t have such things in India however its part of daily life here … its as much part of your life as using paper (by now you know for what)) Oh did you notice I am using brackets in brackets … and you don’t have to apply BODMAS rule from mathematics…. (which says you have to solve the inner most bracket first) you can read the stuff in flow without getting worried about brackets, I am sure it would make sense ( if at all anything is making sense)

Now coming back to the last ritual of taking bath …nothing special about it … you just go and stand in the shower …. yes you do spend some time daily setting the tap for right temperature of water …for few weeks I did almost burnt myself or almost freeze myself … now am getting better at it ….

You take bath … you wipe yourself up and then wear clothes … and lo! you are ready to launch yourself (by the way I have this feeling to explain the process of wearing clothes, its very interesting …it not as simple as just writing wear clothes …there’s very much more to it … may be some other day I will touch upon it)

After this comes the most difficult bit … and it is difficult for everybody … now there are two categories in this everybody … category one … Single …category two Married …we can further have males and females in category one… category two can be divided into Married with no kids and Married with kids … everybody has their own share of difficulties… As I am in male in category one… I will be much confident about talking for Single male’s difficulties who can further be classified as Single male who can cook and single male who cannot cook … as I have some knowledge of the names of vegetables and shapes of spices and color of pulses I think I am a Single Male who can cook ….so that makes me think that i have less difficulties than all other categories (don’t ask me or don’t even bother to go up and check what categories … I don’t remember what the classification was … and I am sure I will not use any of the categories ahead…. easy!)

P.S. Thought i would re read it and improve on it …however i think i am too lazy to do same now … so posting it as is … eat it with all the errors …